What Scares You

I don't go into haunted houses anymore, not the commercial kind at least. It's unfortunate in one sense because I love to see the special effects, the makeup and the creativity. Spooky stuff is fun. When it comes to movies, I've always liked the classic monsters and have a particular fondness for werewolves. Though I've never cared for the simple blood-and-gore slasher sort, a suspenseful, truly creepy horror film is a delight that can prompt spontaneous shivers for weeks. I'll even take a little gore if the context is worth it, as in the case of the comedic horror movies that spoof our traditional fare. So, why avoid the seasonal treat of a trip through a haunted house?

We'll start the explanation with a story. I guess I might have been about ten years old, sitting on a bench swing in the yard with my older sister. It was a late summer night and as dark and quiet as a secluded community with only a handful of street lights gets. The moon was full but veiled by clouds off and on, just like every spooky movie moon you've ever seen. Back then, I had a certain fear of the dark - not the outright terror that forces some children to sleep with a night light, but the kind of uneasiness that quickens your pace as you walk through the darkness to areas that are better lit. So, my sister started to play on that uneasiness, commenting in hoarse whispers about the darkness, the occasional unidentifiable rustle in the foliage, and what always happens when the moon is full like this... A word or two about vampires followed by a sudden lunge in my direction won her a quick and hearty punch in the stomach. It was a surprise to both of us. The action was so instinctual, so swift and precise, and completely unexpected.

I am not generally a violent person. For the most part, I tend to be calm and patient, enduring all sorts of goading before I push back. My sister might have expected me to startle at the scare, then stand up and walk away. She certainly didn't count on me fighting back. But I've discovered, from that incident and a few others since, that that's exactly what I do. When I feel threatened, I go straight at what scares me. Sudden threats, where I have little time to assess the true degree of the threat, are the most vulnerable to a physical response; so, things that jump at me from the darkness are likely to suffer. The ghosts and ghouls in a haunted house just wouldn't stand a chance.

My cousin, who has worked, run and designed a number of haunted houses, tells me the response is not unusual. Even he has punched a hapless ghoul who made the mistake of popping up too close. Employees of the attractions are told to beware of flying fists and to keep a safe distance from the patrons for just that reason. Still, the last time I visited a haunted house, I spent an uncomfortable amount of time apologizing, and it's probably best I avoid the situation entirely.

I may miss out on a little Halloween fun, but this habit of mine has translated into a healthy philosophy for dealing with life's scary bits. Like anyone, I'm afraid now and then. I have my anxious moments. I'll occasionally catch myself avoiding an issue that makes me uncomfortable, but generally, I make an effort to face what scares me. I've discovered that by doing so, you often learn there was nothing to be afraid of in the first place. Even when the threat is real, you're better able to deal with it because you've chosen to meet it head on.

Long before I read Scott Kenemore's Zen of Zombie (a very funny book, by the way,) I had developed my own zombie-based philosophy. In the movies, you can run from what frightens you (the zombies,) but eventually, they're going to catch up to you and try to eat your brain. When they do, you're likely to be weary from running, and you'll have to make your stand in less than ideal conditions with poor choices of weaponry on hand. It's far better to pick your battleground early and stage your defense on your terms. The zombies never expect that.

I think that part of Halloween's appeal is based on this same principle. At Halloween, we are encouraged to look at what scares us, to feel that vulnerability, and then to become, ourselves, the thing that goes bump in the night.

When you examine the things that scare you and confront those fears, they usually melt away. Real or not, the perceived threat has been dealt with. It may make you dangerous to haunted house staff, but you'll benefit in the long run. You sleep a lot better when you've grabbed the monster under the bed by the lapels, looked him in the eye, and come to an agreement.

And, yes, he does have lapels. You'd know that if you'd hauled him out from his usual hiding spot. Bed monsters are actually pretty dapper dressers.

So, this Halloween season, I challenge you to get to know the monster under your bed. Think about your fears and what you can do to overcome them. Don't ever be afraid to face what scares you.